You can’t be lonely if you like yourself

Loneliness is considered one of the largest public health challenges the world today. In 2022, a study, in the UK showed almosthalf (49.63% of adults, 25.99 million people) reported feeling lonely from time to time.

The deleterious effects of loneliness can be behavioral, psychological, and physiological.  

Loneliness affects health 

Behavioral: Yes, loneliness can lead to health-risk behaviors, such as smoking and physical inactivity. 

Psychological: A decline in mental health due to having more time alone to ruminate on worries and negative thoughts, losing confidence in your ability to socialize, lower self-esteem, and not talking about how you feel.  

Physiological: Increase in risks: Early mortality is up by 26%, with a 29% increase in coronary heart disease, a 32% increase in stroke, high blood pressure, and reduced immunity against infections.

Enjoying spending time by yourself doesn’t mean you become lonely. You do have friends, but you just like being alone and have less need for socializing than others. It gives you a chance to talk to yourself. In fact, being alone is a necessity. You get to know yourself better than anyone. It feels like taking a breath of fresh air.

Blessed are those who do not fear solitude, who are not afraid of their own company, who are not always desperately looking for something to do, something to amuse themselves with, something to judge. If you are never alone, you cannot know yourself. 

Know the value of developing a friendly relationship with your mind, as it always keeps youcompany! 

Blessed are those who do not fear solitude, who are not afraid of their own company, who are not always desperately looking for something to do, something to amuse themselves with, something to judge. 

I must rule my mind by keeping it clear and clean, or my mind will rule me! When I am alone in the silence of inner quietness, my mind also quiets down, and my ability to think and decide clearly increases. ‘Listening in’ to check and change your thoughts creates constant pure feelings for yourself and others, a very high stage to reach in the world as it is today…. but possible! 

You are courageous and confident, have strong will power, are open-minded, and look at the bright side. Being alone helps us not to attach or be dependent on others but to grow a deeper sense of self-reliance, self-trust, and self-esteem. I have the time to look at myself, to appreciate my inner beauty, and remember how special I am.

Wayne Dyer said you can’t be lonely if you like the person you’re alone with. Norman Vincent Peale added: “Learn to like yourself since you must spend so much time with yourself, you might as well get some satisfaction out of the relationship.”

Awareness of our identity as soul

Being alone helps us become aware of our true identity as soul, an eternal spiritual being radiating light. I the soul creates thoughts and am separate from the physical body. To become soul conscious, practice by thinking ‘I the living light, the soul, am looking from behind the windows of my physical eyes’. ‘The eyes are the windows of the soul’ is a well-knownmetaphor, meaning that a person’s eyes can reveal their feelings or thoughts. Consider it literally and hold this awareness for several moments.

We never feel alone when we teach our mind to talk to God, and maintain a link of communication with Him. Transformation of the self and the world comes from keeping God’s company. We feel very good knowing and appreciating what God has helped us to achieve.

Illustrations courtesy : Brahma Kumaris

Contact: Yvonne Chirya Risely (bkchirya@gmail.comor chirya.risely@peacevillageretreat.org). To register for ongoing meditation classes and retreats at Peace Village,  Haines Falls, NY call +1 518 589 5000.