It’s that time of year again when we reflect on the past year and decide to improve our lives in the coming year. It’s time to make New Year’s resolutions once again, as we have done for countless years before.
I conducted a survey with my clients around the world and found a clear pattern. The top 3 resolutions people make are similar. They are
- Fitness / Weight Loss / Improved Health
- Income / Money / Wealth
- Improved Relationships
The most common resolution is to exercise more and get fit. Many people resolve to improve their physical health by exercising more regularly. They want to lose weight, look better, reduce their clothes size, etc.
The second common resolution is to increase income, earn more, save money, and manage finances better. We want to have more financial freedom and cash available to enhance our choices. Financial goals, such as saving more money or reducing debt, are common resolutions.
The third common resolution is to improve our relationships, whether with our life partner, children, siblings, parents, or friends.
We want our lives to improve, elevate, and evolve our journey on earth. From a higher perspective, resolutions are more than just goals; they are a spiritual journey toward self-improvement and fulfillment.
Let’s look deeper at why this phenomenon of making New Year’s resolutions happens without fail every year. They are often jettisoned soon after and repeated as another year ends, continuing the disappointing cycle endlessly.
Top Reasons Why People Set New Year Resolutions
We Want a Fresh Start: The New Year symbolizes a new beginning, making it an ideal time to establish new goals. Resolutions provide a sense of renewal and the opportunity to abandon past behaviors while embracing new habits.
We Desire Personal Growth & Improvement: Many people set resolutions as a proactive step toward personal development. This period of reflection allows them to identify areas for growth and improvement, aiming to enhance their quality of life and capabilities.
Resolutions are a form of goal setting, helping individuals define what they wish to accomplish within the year.
Social or Cultural Influences: The tradition of setting resolutions is deeply embedded in many cultures. Social norms and communal practices often influence people to partake in this ritual, aligning with group behaviors or expectations.
Resolutions often reflect one’s core values and deepest aspirations, expressing the desire to live a more meaningful life.
Even though these motivations drive us to set resolutions, it’s common that soon after the New Year starts, these commitments diminish in importance and are soon shelved altogether.
Why does this happen? And can we do anything to make our resolutions our reality with a greater degree of confirmation?
My answer is YES.
Keep it simple. Break down your resolutions into specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound (SMART) goals. This is an old formula, but it still works.
Why We Fail To Stay True To Our Resolutions
Let’s first look at why we fail to stay true to our resolutions. Here are some reasons people fail to keep their New Year resolutions
- Lack of Clear and Realistic Goals: Many resolutions fail because they aren’t specific or achievable. When people set overly ambitious or vague goals, measuring progress or maintaining motivation becomes difficult.
- Insufficient Planning and Preparation: Without a detailed plan to achieve their goals, people struggle to implement necessary changes. Proper planning involves setting smaller, actionable steps toward the larger goal.
- Loss of Motivation Over Time: Initial enthusiasm can wane as time passes, especially if the results aren’t immediate. People lose motivation due to a lack of visible progress or because they underestimate the effort required to sustain change. Having a short-term focus can exhaust our motivation to continue when the results take longer.
- External Pressure and Influence: Setting resolutions based on societal expectations or peer pressure rather than personal desire can lead to a lack of genuine commitment. Without personal motivation, it’s easy to abandon our goals. So, it’s imperative to remember that the environment we surround ourselves with is usually stronger than our willpower. Unless we create an environment that supports us, we set ourselves up to fail.
- Limited Self-Discipline and Support: Maintaining resolutions requires consistent effort and self-discipline. Without adequate support from friends, family, or support groups, individuals may find it challenging to stay accountable and motivated. Having a trainer, coach, or mentor to guide and support us in our journey and provide both motivation and accountability is a strategic decision we must make and implement.
Understanding these common reasons that make us quit can enhance our chances of successfully achieving our resolutions.
An overarching theme that causes our failure is that we find it extremely difficult to change our existing patterns of thinking, acting, and behaving.
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Why It Is Hard to Change Our Patterns Of Thinking and Acting
Changing these patterns is challenging due to psychological, biological, and environmental factors. Here are some reasons why it’s so difficult:
- Repeated behaviors and thoughts create strong neural pathways in the brain, making them automatic. Changing a pattern requires creating new pathways, which takes effort and time. The brain prefers efficiency and defaults to well-established habits to conserve energy.
- Familiar patterns, even if unproductive or harmful, feel safe. Change introduces uncertainty, which can trigger fear and anxiety. The comfort zone provides a psychological shield, making stepping outside of it intimidating.
- Biases like confirmation bias or the sunk cost fallacy reinforce existing beliefs and behaviors. These biases cause individuals to focus on information that supports their current mindset, making change harder.
- Many patterns operate subconsciously. Without self-awareness, it’s difficult to recognize what needs to change. People often act on autopilot, unaware of the underlying triggers driving their behavior.
- Change often involves temporary discomfort, frustration, or setbacks, which can discourage people. The brain seeks immediate gratification and avoids pain, making persistence difficult.
- Social and physical environments reinforce existing patterns. Change becomes harder if those around us or our surroundings support old habits. Environmental cues can act as triggers, pulling individuals back into old patterns.
- New habits or ways of thinking often don’t produce instant results, making them less appealing. Humans are wired to seek immediate rewards, so delayed gratification can feel unsatisfying.
- Changing too many things at once or focusing on unrealistic goals can lead to burnout. Small, incremental changes are often more sustainable than radical overhauls.
- Willpower is a finite resource. Constantly resisting old patterns drains mental energy, making it easier to revert to them. Without supportive habits or systems, willpower alone is rarely enough for sustained change.
- Evolution has wired humans for survival, favoring routines and predictable behaviors that conserve energy and avoid risk. The brain’s survival mechanisms resist change because it perceives it as a potential threat.
- Many thought and behavior patterns are conditioned from childhood or past experiences, making them deeply ingrained. Undoing years of conditioning requires conscious effort and often external guidance.
- Internal dialogue, such as “I can’t change” or “This is just who I am,” reinforces stagnation. Limiting beliefs act as self-fulfilling prophecies, making people less likely to attempt change.
- Friends, family, or society may resist your change because it challenges their perceptions or creates distance. Changing patterns may lead to alienation, which can discourage individuals.
These are some reasons why sticking to our resolutions and making them a reality can be difficult. Now, let’s look at how we can better incorporate our resolutions into our new lives.
6 effective ways to turn your resolutions into reality
- Think Small: Success and victory result from many small wins. So, set clear and attainable goals. Make sure your goals are realistic. Keep it simple. Break down your resolutions into specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound (SMART) goals. This is an old formula, but it still works. By setting clear and realistic objectives, you’ll have a clearer focus and be more likely to achieve them. Always focus on incremental changes rather than overhauls.
- Keep it Visible: A vision without a plan is fantasy. Outline the steps needed to reach your goals. Develop a timeline with milestones to track your progress. Having a plan helps you stay organized and makes it easier to follow your intentions.
- Stay Accountable: Share your goals with friends, family, or a support group. Regularly update them on your progress, which can encourage and hold you accountable. Create supportive surroundings and avoid triggers.
- Get Support: You must get yourself an accountability partner. Find and hire a qualified coach, trainer, or mentor to motivate you along the journey and hold you accountable for your vision. Their experience can be priceless.
- Keep it Progressive: Think long term, not short term. Celebrate small wins. Acknowledge and celebrate your progress along the way. Recognizing small victories can boost your motivation and reinforce positive behaviors, inspiring you to continue moving forward.
- Practice Self-Compassion and Flexibility: Understand that setbacks might happen, and that’s okay. Be kind to yourself and adjust your plan as needed. Flexibility in your approach allows you to adapt to changes and stay on track even when things don’t go as planned. Accept setbacks as part of the process.
Change is challenging but possible with consistent effort, self-awareness, and the right mindset. By incorporating the above strategies, you can enhance your ability to keep your New Year resolutions and achieve meaningful, lasting change.
Spiritual Principles to Help Improve Ourselves
Spiritual wisdom can also provide a powerful foundation by offering deeper insights and guidance on personal growth. Here are some spiritual principles that can help us strive to improve ourselves.
Mindfulness and Presence: Practicing mindfulness helps you stay present and focused on your goals. By being aware of your thoughts and actions, you can make conscious choices that align with your resolutions and avoid distractions.
Self-Compassion: Embrace self-compassion by being gentle with yourself, especially when facing setbacks. Recognize that mistakes are part of the journey, and treat yourself with kindness, which fosters resilience and perseverance.
Intention Setting: Go beyond simple goal setting by attaching meaningful intentions to your resolutions. This involves connecting your goals to your core values and higher purpose and aligning them with your spiritual journey.
Inner Reflection and Meditation: Regular reflection and meditation can provide clarity and insight into your desires and potential. This practice enhances self-awareness and strengthens your commitment to fulfilling your resolutions.
By integrating these spiritual insights into your approach, you can create a more holistic and sustainable path toward achieving your New Year resolutions, enriching your personal and spiritual life.
Use the above wisdom and strategies to make 2025 your best year yet.
Wisdom Wins.
