Choose to describe the glass as half-full. This is called ‘gain framing’ because you focus on what is gained not what is lost.
According to social psychology, positive or negative framing starts with the small decisions we make throughout the day.
When something goes wrong at work, we reflexively take that negative experience and hold onto it for the rest of the day or maybe even for the whole week. That tendency is a product of how our brains are wired.
Our view of the world has a fundamental tendency to tilt toward the negative. Research shows that we have to work harder to see the upside.
Researchers have tried to find psychological tools that allow people to change and reframe their experiences. They have found that when it comes to optimistic thinking, the tools to turn negative situations into positive ones are in our own hands.
Our minds may be built to look for negative information and to hold onto it, but we can also retrain our minds if we put some effort into it and start to see that the glass may be a little fuller than we initially thought.
Here are a few ways you can train your mind to reframe your failures, let go of negativity, and focus on the good.
Practice ‘gain framing’
The ‘framing effect’ is a psychological concept that concerns how you tell your stories to others; recalling your own experiences can alter the way you see them. Social science research shows that how you describe a glass to people changes how they feel about it.
If you describe the glass as half-full, this is called a ‘gain frame,’ because you are focusing on what is gained. But if you describe the same glass as half-empty, it is a loss frame. When we use gain framing to describe our experiences to others, we start to see the given situation in a positive light. It is about learning to rehearse good news and share it with others.
Acknowledge one good thing
Reframing a negative experience is not always easy. When you are upset, it can help to focus on a different experience you feel good about. While it is easy to assume that venting will help eliminate your negative emotions, dwelling instead on one good thing that happened that day could prompt your brain to switch directions which is ultimately more helpful.
For optimal practice, you are suggested to take pen to paper even if it feels difficult in the moment. You have to work to see the upside. Writing for a few minutes daily about things you are grateful for can dramatically boost your happiness and well-being.
Respond counterintuitively
How we react in the moment can make a significant difference, too. What if the next time somebody snapped at you, you forgave them? Or what if the next time you had a grumpy waiter, you left her an extra-large tip? By responding counterintuitively and offering ourselves time to reframe, we can stop our brains from the cycle of dwelling on the negative and then spreading it. One mean comment can stick with somebody all day… and that tends to propagate itself. How we respond can determine how our minds see the experience in retrospect.
